I don’t have much to say about these pictures of Penelope Cruz at the Screen Actors Guild Awards the other night. Other than I love you and wish that you would dump that creepy guy from and run away with me to some far off land where they preferably speak english because I have enough trouble understanding the shit that comes out of your mouth as it is and I might get easily confused. Think about it and get back to me. I can’t wait forever.

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I Want to be the Meat in a Cruz Sister Sandwich
Penelope Cruz is Perfect
Penelope Cruz Bikini Pictures

These pictures of Penelope Cruz playing grab ass in the ocean with that asshole boyfriend of hers are really pissing me off. She knows how I feel about her, why would she think this would be alright with me? I guess she thought that if she showed off enough of her killer body in that little bikini of hers I wouldn’t mind…. She was right. She knows me so well.

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I Want to be the Meat in a Cruz Sister Sandwich
Penelope Cruz is Perfect
Penelope Cruz Bikini Pictures

Penelope Cruz can do no wrong in my books. Here she is at the premiere of Nine looking good enough to eat, or at least snack on a little. Obviously I’m never going to go see this movie, but I’m glad that Penelope is in it because that means more pictures for me. How do you say hump in spanish? Doesn’t matter, we’ll cross that bridge when we get to it.

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I Want to be the Meat in a Cruz Sister Sandwich
Penelope Cruz is Perfect
Penelope Cruz Bikini Pictures

I’m still in love with Penelope Cruz, even if she never invites me to the premieres of her movies or even takes me out at all anymore. I know that makes me a sucker, that and the fact that she’s marrying someone else, but I love her. What can I say? Besides, look at those big old boobies. How could any man stay mad at those her.

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I Want to be the Meat in a Cruz Sister Sandwich
Penelope Cruz is Perfect
Penelope Cruz Bikini Pictures

I’m still in love with Penelope Cruz, even if she’s wearing a disgusting grunge outfit from the nineties, it doesn’t make any difference to me. That’s true love. Obviously I’d prefer that she wore some sort of short mini skirt all the time, especially while cleaning the house, but I’ll take what I can get. Besides, she’d look good wearing a potato sack.

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I Want to be the Meat in a Cruz Sister Sandwich
Penelope Cruz is Perfect
Penelope Cruz Bikini Pictures

Here’s Penelope Cruz in Cannes the other day at a photo call for her new film “Los Abrazos Rotos” getting man handled and molested by the film’s director Pedro Almodovar. He calls her his muse. Call her whatever you want, if I was this old guy I’d have my sausage fingers all over Penelope too. I’d also probably have a few cocktails and be wearing very fine silk pants to make the moment even more memorable.

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I Want to be the Meat in a Cruz Sister Sandwich
Penelope Cruz is Perfect
Penelope Cruz Bikini Pictures