Apparently Paris Hilton hosted some sort of slutty Easter party this weekend and dressed her scrawny little ass up in the classic Playboy bunny suit. Obviously I wasn’t invited, f@#kers, I couldn’t go anyway because I wasted half the weekend trying to dye my balls all kinds of festive colors as an Easter egg hunt surprise for my ladyfriend so I missed out on all the excitement. Unfortunately she still hasn’t found them.

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